When I wanted to create the file for todays blog post, my static blog system told me, there’s already a post with the same post slug. That wondered me and I thought it must be an error. But it wasn’t. I already wrote about “lack of motivation” more than a year ago. That just shows how much I struggle with motivation. At the moment I struggle a lot again. Currently I have to learn for exams.
Today I had no university. But that didn’t mean I had nothing to do. I had a lot to do. I had to learn so much for my exams next week! But today I also noticed how hard it is to ignore distractions. Distractions are everywhere. A few examples: I want to write a simple mail to someone at the company, but I find another mail… I want to do some online exercises but while typing the URL into the address bar, my eye catches something in the auto completion list… A notification appears on my phone and instead of turning it off, I keep using it and eventually end up watching YouTube videos instead of learning.
I was about writing a post complaining about failing with my new goals. But does complaining bring you any further in life? No! So I’m writing about my positive progress instead, because I did a morning run today and it feels sooo great… 😏 Today, I got up at 5 am. Yes, that’s really early compared to the times I got up over the last weeks, which was usually just 7:30, sometimes even 8:30.
There are things I don’t like to do, but I have to. Due to that there’s a lack of motivation sometimes, I just don’t want to do it, but I have no other option. The worst kind of things I don’t like to do are the things I’m stuck at. When I just have no idea how to solve them. And there are things I like to do, but lack motivation to.
Things aren’t going well currently. My procrastination is my top activity and the list with tasks to do is growing each day. My room is a mess and I’m using my phone more than I should. But what’s wrong? Why is my motivation kidding me? Why can’t I get myself to do something productive? Like writing an article or writing a few lines of code? But instead I somehow end up watching YouTube videos, scrolling through my Twitter feed and browsing the web.